We're having a baby, baby!!!

Pregnancy tests ... I used to hate those things. Seriously, I would pee on them constantly. For 14 months, whenever I felt slight headache (hormonal changes mean baby!), or my boobs were sore (again, BABY!), or when I thought I was late (BABY! BABY! BABY!)! But every test came out negative. It was so frustrating. I began googling "Do some women never get a positive on a pregnancy test, even if they are?!"

I stopped at nothing to get the bottom of my problem. But no one had an answer. It was simple — I. Could. NOT. Get. Pregnant.

Both of my sisters got pregnant so easily. Why me? Why was this an issue I had to deal with?

After month and months...and then a year...and some more months, God finally gave me exactly what I've been praying for.

It was a Monday. I had stayed home from work the Friday before I took the test because I had felt icky.

Through the weekend, I was exhausted and figured I was coming down with the flu. Pregnancy was not even a twinkle in my mind because, after begging God for a little one, I had finally given up. I began looking into joining the Navy so I could develop my photography even further. I just thought, "OK, God. I'm trusting you! You know what's best!"

I told my husband I was going to take a test that week, just in case. But I wanted to put it off because I was so tired of peeing on that stupid stick and having it read back, "No, Valerie, you aren't pregnant, just like yesterday, and the day before, and five minutes before that! NO. The answer is NO!" Seriously, my digital test would say that. I didn't know they could personalize them like that! :)

Monday morning came and I was still dragging. I went to my car and pulled out the Walgreens bag with the devil pee stick in it and walked sl----oooowwww-----ly back into the house.

I wasn't even going to text or call my working hubby to disturb him because I knew it was going to say NO.

I took the devil test out of its evil wrapper and did my business. I remember sitting there watching it, saying, "Hurry up and say no so I can go back to bed."

But something crazy happened...

Holy. TOLEDO! These things work? These things work! THESE THINGS WORK!!!!!!!

I hyperventilated for a minute and then said out loud, "Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!!!!" I felt a warm sensation come over me, as if He was saying, "I told you to trust me, you stubborn girl!"

I e-mailed the picture above to my husband and text him to tell him I had sent an e-mail.

"I don't have anything," he sent back.

"CHECK AGAIN!!!!!!!" I responded.

"What is it?" he wrote.

Oh for heaven's sake!!! C'MON! Freaking modern technology! So I resent the e-mail ...

Obviously, he got the e-mail. Ignore the cursing ... my hubby was freaking out.

He promptly followed that text up with jewels like, "I have to get another job!!!!!!" and "I'm SO SCARED!" Later, I found out he also threw up — something I have not done at all in my first four month of pregnancy!

It's been about three and a half months since that day. It was such a fun day! We went to my father-in-law's work and told him the good news and I called my mom and sisters and my editor ... and then I posted it on Facebook. I seriously couldn't wait a single second longer! I had thought about how I would announce it for over a year.

I'm nearly four month pregnant and it's been so easy. I feel so wrong in saying that! (Knock on wood!) I see others around me getting super sick and looking miserable. I'm tired and that's about it.

It almost scares me how easy it is. I keep thinking, "Something MUST be wrong! This is way too easy!" I've been able to coach my volleyball team, run practices, exercise, do yoga, and work my full-time job. It hasn't always been easy, but God is sustaining me!

We had our first ultrasound done at 12 weeks ...

It's so unreal. It was like I was in a dream — but this time, I wasn't going to wake up. I can't describe the joy I felt when I watched my hubby watch the screen and when the doctor pointed out the beating heart. He had to fight back the tears. It was a magical moment.

I can't wait to be a mommy, to make everyday an adventure for my child, to play make believe with him/her, to build forts and play in them together. I can't wait to teach my child to pray and read them the same Bible stories I was read growing up. I can't wait to make this world a special place for them — a place where they really feel like they can accomplish anything.

For so many years, while coaching, I've been attempting to inspire other people's children — to teach them to live fearlessly, to teach them to be brave enough to dream big, and to show them how they can accomplish those dreams. And now, I feel so blessed to be able to do that for my own child.

Of course, I have my own dreams for him (I REALLY WANT A BOY!!!!) ...

... but I will be sure that whatever he or she wants to accomplish, I will be there every step of the way to support them.

I feel so blessed and so excited to start my family. After so many years of heartbreak and pain in the relationship department with lame men who said a lot but never followed through, I got my prince charming in Brandis. He's not perfect, but I know I'm blessed to have him.

And now, we get to bring this perfect little person into the world and we get to guide him or her through their lives.

I know I haven't blogged in awhile! But, first, I was busy trying to make a baby! Now, I'm busy trying to get ready for baby!

All I know is that there isn't a timing better than the Lords. This is the perfect time for us to be parents and we are so excited to begin out journey.

I'll try to keep the blog updated about the pregnancy! I felt him/her move for the first time today! But I'll blog about that tomorrow!

For now, I'll leave you with the song I've been singing to me baby since the moment I found out about him/her.



Always remember, God's timing is perfect